Reasons You Shouldn't Forward Me That Email
- I eat puppies, kittens, and other cute animals, and sending me pictures of them only makes me hungry for more.
- I've been on the Internet forever and have already seen/heard/smelled whatever you're sending before.
- You'd like me to remain your friend.
- I don't care if the kid dies from cancer.
- I have a sense of humor and that joke isn't remotely funny.
- If you forward that message to ten of your friends then a unicorn dies.
- You'll prove once and for all that I'm smarter than you.
- I am actually hoping to get robbed/mugged/carjacked.
- If I wanted to see pictures of babies, I'd buy an Anne Geddes book.
- If it doesn't have to do with making my penis bigger then I don't want it in my Inbox.
- Bill Gates already sent me my free Xbox, $1000, and tickets to Disney. I don't want to be greedy.